Man-Size (man_size) wrote,

Being the Monkey

I don't mind the occasional video and live stream for promo purposes but what I mostly do is draw comix and sometimes write theater -- which isn't that fun to watch evolve in real time. Suddenly, you find yourself having to entertain while working. Sure it can be educational to show what you do but I'm no teacher. In 2006, I helped lift the veil between creator and creation online via ACT-I-VATE; unlocking the doors to any and all so they could potentially invest more in the product; manifest a loyal fan base of sorts, and I sometimes regret that. It can kill the magic and sparks an expectation that the creator MUST share their process and secrets more than ever before. As if process is now part of the final experience. For some projects that's true and/or serves the world of that project but for others I find it bloated and unnecessary. Again, this is coming from the guy who sometimes takes off his shirt in public (with the aim) to get people to read his free webcomic (<---in retrospect, that's kinda sad). Sharing ancillary aspects online to create the verisimilitude of intimacy between product and consumer is a recent conundrum for me. I no longer wish to be the monkey for my art. I just want to make the art or, at the very least, the thing I wish to express sans bells and whistles. I wish to be the author, not the publicist AND publisher AND distributor but that's where things are these days in our crowd-funding/Patreon world for stay-at-home entrepreneurs (and I'm seriously considering those financing models). I get that ya gotta beat the drum and show up to your own party but I fear that if you don't publish the process on social networking venues -- well -- then maybe it didn't happen and maybe the end result doesn't carry the same weight. And, for a lot of creators, that ONE day of the year that you release your art gets lost in the deluge of chatter and gossip and shame. Now, imagine trying to achieve that once a week? Welcome to the popularity contest called "Your Life." Unless you have big connections and deep pockets, who can compete with the digital ticker tape of outrage culture coupled with consuming an abnormal amount of STUFF for free as long as you can pay the monthly phone bill? I know it's not that black & white but turning 50 last May and still trying to make ends meet while struggling to sway middle-aged folks like myself to NOT wholly abandon the internet and subscribe to yet another damned thing just to keep up with ME, ME and ME, while concurrently trying to appeal to self-entitled, attention deficit consumers is a bitch (and, frankly disheartening) and has me thinking a lot about this stuff and what to do, rather than focusing on the stuff I love to make in hopes that you will love it, too. It's exhausting.

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